Know it All Boys

"Know it All Boys" is a season 2 episode of the Summerlands, in which the Summerlands discover a box of "Canadian Squirt Guns".

Characters

 * Patrick
 * Double D
 * Zack
 * Jimmy
 * Sarah
 * Kevin
 * Nazz
 * Jonny
 * Rolf
 * The Kanker Sisters

Plot
The Summerlands are larging it at the dump again and after some futile horn blowing and the odd bit of dog piling they chance upon a big box of abandoned turkey basters … except of course they're not turkey basters at all, they're aliens exploratory probes … or there again they could be Canadian squirt guns. Either way they spell one thing to Zack - CASH - he thinks everyone should have one of these babies! After a bit of the usual Zack sales spiel and a lot of flannel everyone in the cul-de-sac soon does have one and its not long before the whole place has gone squirt-gun toting crazy. Pioneers move in from the plains in their wagons and the big guys beat on the little guys - its anarchy and seeing an opportunity to cash in - yet again - Marshall Zack and his Posse swagger into town to administer heavy justice and heavier fines in their own inimitable and biased way. However when Pioneer Jonny is ambushed by the Kanker Sisters, the Marshall begins to feel he's bitten off more than he can chew, battle commences but will the Summerlands triumph and come up smelling of roses or will is victory bear the not so subtle tang of Crankshaft No.5.

Quotes

 * Patrick: "I am a whale Zack- an endangered mammal". Hug me."


 * Patrick: "Canadians are weird!"


 * Patrick: [looking at the turkey basters] "Oh look! A whole box of alien exploratory probes, dropped off in an attempt to save fuel during a mutiny of pulsing brain mutants."


 * Zack: [looking at Patrick with surprise] "I think that eyebrow's too heavy for his head."


 * Double D: [freaking out with his powerful weapon] "Oh I feel it! I feel the adrenaline, Zack baby!" Zack: "Double D! Double D! Relax will ya? It’s a toy - from Canada - how embarrassing."


 * Patrick: [appreciatively sniffing the perfumed Plank] "Plank reminds me of fresh cut flowers strewn across a babbling brook with a hint of lemon."


 * Zack: "Attack the lump!"


 * Zack: "Okay, kank-- Okay, kankers. I'm calling you out!"


 * Patrick: "I'm a moose, Double D."