Make Room for Patrick

"Make Room for Patrick" is a season 2 episode of the Summerlands, in which Patrick leaves home and Rolf finds that like fish, guests begin to smell after a couple of days...

Location

 * Patrick's House
 * Rolf's House

Characters

 * Patrick
 * Double D
 * Zack
 * Rolf
 * Jimmy
 * Sarah
 * Kevin (does not speak)
 * Nazz (does not speak)

Plot
The future holds CASH for Zack and Co, or at least it would if he could get his fortune telling act together - spirits can be capricious things, especially when suspended by one eyebrow! Rolf and Jonny have almost bought his act but as ever fate steps in and deals Zack the usual devastating sideswipe, this time in the shape of Sarah looking for Patrick because one of his whiffy socks has roamed into her room and boy is he ever in trouble … again. True to her nature, Sarah isn't satisfied with just an apology and to redeem himself the passive Patrick is left with a long list of chores. Seeing his buddy being emotionally blackmailed is too much for Zack and he persuades Patrick that he needs to strike out alone and this means moving house. So before you can say gravy all Patrick's pungent possessions are swiftly transplanted to Rolf's garden shed and at first the kind-hearted Rolf is quite taken with the idea of having guests although he soon finds that it doesn't take long for the novelty to wear off. In a nutshell the Eds get in Rolf's way, they scoff all his food, they commandeer his house, they interfere with his farm work and they cramp his style. Those boys have no respect and its got to stop, will the spirits help this time?

Quotes

 * Rolf: [worried about Zack's spirit summoning spell] "I think we have angered the spirits as it is a travesty to mix salami and baloney."


 * Zack: [waiting without subtlety for money] "The spirits are a little low on cash and need bus fare to join us 0 cross town, full fare!"


 * Patrick: "It wasn't me Sarah, I always put the seat down!"

Patrick: "I had socks on, Zack!"
 * Zack: [exasperated at Patrick's manipulation by Sarah] "If she told you to jump in the lake with a rock tied to your head and waited for naked pictures of you to develop so she could hand 'em out to all the kids in the cul-de-sac, would you?!"


 * Zack: [manipulating Ed's mouth and impersonating him] "I like it Zack. I have one eyebrow and the brain of a bug."


 * Double D: "Curse these short legs!"

Patrick: "Close to a mailbox, Zack."
 * Zack: "Think Patrick, where have you always wanted to live?"


 * Rolf: [after analyzing the earth by chewing a mouthful] "The soil has been leeched. Papa's fermented spoils will cure the plague."


 * Rolf: [praising Patrick for leaving home] "This is a brave thing you do long in the neck boy! Welcome to the house of Rolf. Please make yourself at home as Rolf could not sleep at night knowing dim-lit Ed-Boy is out on the street."


 * Patrick: "I love canoes!"


 * Patrick: "My place is the cat's tuxedo!"


 * Patrick: "I love canoes!"


 * Patrick: Anyone got a breath mint?"

Patrick: "I'm hot tubbing!" Rolf: "Do not frazzle Rolf. Please do not contaminate the food as pigs eat from it."
 * Rolf: [seeing Patrick in the food trough] "Why are you in the trough of food spoils?"


 * Rolf: "May shower scum devour your head!"


 * Rolf: "May your nose fester with the rage of olives!"

Patrick: "What does it say?" Zack: [sarcastically] "Yes, tell us O Swami!"
 * Rolf: [seeing the Summerlands future] "The yeast has risen and tells me the future of the couch-creature boys. The spirit of the rind speaks. Do you hear it?"

Double D: [panicking] "Gloves! I need gloves!" Patrick: "Pumpkins sure are bossy." Zack: "Shut up Patrick!"
 * Rolf: [happy to see the Summerlands working for him] "Also your future will hold that you de-lice the chickens, and shake the dew from the tree, and brush the hair on the back of Rolf!"